you want honest?

i had a friend write me a facebook message the other day and he asked me how i was doing. this was my response:

i'm doing alright. i just heard a message in church today on not being fake, so i'll try not to be. when i really think about it, i'm stressed and worried about life after graduation. i miss my family. i want to be close to my sisters. i don't want to graduate college. i love my girl friends. i'm struggling with areas on what's right and what's wrong in life. mark peterson, who graduated from nwc two years ago, just died in a motorcycle accident yesterday. he was my sister's best friend and kinda like my brother when he was still here on campus. katie is struggling, i want to be with her, but thankfully she's with all of her friends right now. it's tough for me- not because i miss mark, because honestly, i havent seen him much in the past two years. but he was one of those guys that was always there. and i know how much my sister loved him. and it's the first time i've actually been friends with someone who has died. it's stupid. life is stupid sometimes.